Wondering~

P.s: We never been to the beach together. Maybe one day we will made it.

27-11-2011-HAPPY DAY

This is the happiest day in my life since I came to Kelantan. Surprisingly, I was still able to find a fraction of happiness at here. And it was the craziest day at here too. There is a lot thing I wanna share but my mind is so cramped.

So I decide to allow the photos speak out in this blog.

Knock! Knock!

me and the deer at the park^^

me and the fountain at the park

me at tutti frutti

tutti frutti 1

tutti frutti 2

tutti frutti 3

tutti frutti 4

tutti frutti 5

trutti frutti 6

trutti frutti 7

trutti frutti 8

Sarcasm~ Bazinga! :P

Sarcasm is a new word for me but this word actually had existed around me quite a long time (since I was born to this cruel ruled world :P). Finally, I find this word to define people around me- sarcasm.

So, my definition for sarcasm means the use of unpleasant remarks with the intention to hurt people’s feeling. Ever wonder where I learn this world. I learn it from a comedy The Big Bang Theory (the comedies that I recommend everyone to watch. BAZINGA~).

Ay!

This post is not on The Big Bang Theory review (although I would give a 8.5 out 10 for this comedy^^).  But I wanna talk about how people sarcasm me. Maybe in the comedy it looks funny but in the reality it hurts and shatters me into pieces.

Story #1

It happens back at my university (my life *UCK here) where I just did my ear piercing. For me wearing an earring it was kind of fashion but for them it’s a taboo. Many people sarcasm me whether with intention or not.

Some say guy wearing an earring will bring bad luck (kinda right since I meet you bunch of as*). Some say guy wearing an earring is gay (kiss my as*). I rather play basketball than Barbie :P

Story #2

Also happen at my university, where my housemates sarcasm on how I look. A guy which is skinnier than me told me that look too thin and reminds me to eat more. Another roommate who just wears like a kid told me to dress up better. Sometimes I wonder did they even stare at themselves in the mirror for 5 minutes (I did this all the time and remind myself “I ain’t created perfect but I am trying my best to be perfect”).

Blah Blah Blah.. Not in the mood to talk about the past because I learn that we can’t change the past but we can change the future. So peps let’s move on.

Here is the advice I would like to share when you be sarcasm:

BUCK UP!!

That’s right buck up peps. No matters how hard their word hit you, you stay and stood still. Show them that you’re more than a survivor; a fighter. Don’t give up or step back. Its only show them you are weak and easier target for them. Thanks them for sarcasm-ing me (it makes me a stronger person everyday).

And lastly, don’t sarcasm. It’s hurt no matter light or heavy. You never know what consequences your word can bring to people. Think twice before you speak (where people seldom do).  Never too late make a change buddy. PEACE!

bucking up myself at the gym
from physical to emotional
:)

A short weekend..

Hey hey hey.. (I guess this is a cool opening for my post :P)

It’s been November. Next month is December. 2011 gonna end soon.

Wohoo!!

Partay and partay..          fun…      fun..      (ok, it’s sound like Rebecca Black ‘Friday’)

But no party for me  =.=’’’  my mid-term test is coming soon. Tomorrow I will had my test around 2pm but the worst thing is I haven’t study a bit @.@’’’

Hopefully, everything went smoothly tomorrow so I got time to do my very very last minute revision.

1 week back in here is not enough for me (I wish that in 1 day we had more than 24 hours- I also wonder who created 24 hours system). I didn’t get the chance to meet any of my friends. Feels so regret about it.  

Next time, I try my best to meet up with them. Miss them so much. So many things to share with them.

I make this post short because once again I running out of time. Heading to my bed now (because tomorrow I have to get up early =.=’’’)

p.s: for the better tomorrow peps.. fighting!!

That's me.. study hard ^^

Play harder :P

Life is like a wheel~

Hey, wassup!!

It’s been another stressful week for me. *sigh*

Stress what?

Stress with assignment.

Stress with my internship

Stress with my annoying housemate

Stress with stress?!

Wheww!!

Life is like a wheel. Sometimes you on the top of the wheel and sometimes you at bottom of the wheel (which means shit happened).

Assignment is only a normal routine for a university student (so why I had to be so stressful). The reason behind this stressful stuff is I do the assignment all by myself although it is a group assignment (god damn it). I have to accept this asshole to join my group which he won’t do the assignment and he will complain to his fucking buddy that I pressured him. Seriously, no offense but this is a group assignment you asshole. We should know our own responsibility. You are 22 asshole and you still acting like a asshole (wow, nice sentences). At the end, I still finish the assignment myself (OMG!! Give me more strength for this semester).

Next..next..next..

My internship comes so fast. Never think of it will be my next semester. Right now I am searching hard to look for a company to accept me. I heard so many rumors that some company only accept student with pointer 3.35 above (I feels this insulting). In my opinion, even you are a top student doesn’t make you an excellent worker (mark my work). There’s a longer path we need to walk through (the University of socializing). In the end, there is nothing to be proud of being an top student :P

Why must there be an annoying housemate for every semester? What a life? So my housemate is suck. They got a lot of demand. They want this, want that, and want everything. They being pathetic and like sissy. They just know pointing out people mistakes and refuse to accept their mistakes. Wonder how they get in to this university. In the end, I had pretend more in front of them which mean being hypocrite (damn, I really hate being a hypocrite because this is so not me)

p.s: See how stressful am I this day. I only hope that god will reduce my burden. Sorry for cursing and swearing so much here.

like a boss :P

A Moment of Regret..

Hey, sorry for my last post. Feel so stupid for posting something that is so negative in my previous post. From now on, I promise to myself that I wouldn’t repeat the same mistake again in my life. That’s why I decided to delete that post. Feel so sorry to cause my parent so worry about me (damn!! Why do always make them worry me). Here, I also would like to apologize for those who read my previous blog. 

Sorry sorry and sorry.

hey, wassup..

At My Limit..

Yesterday was a really frustrating day for me. Why? Because after 3 years I been this university, I still hate this university. The hatred is just same as the first day I step in to this university (I’m sorry but I have to be honest). I have tried my hardest to see the optimistic side. Still this university disappointed from one thing to another thing. From the facilities to the staff, the courses to the lecturer totally a doom.  I always wonder why is this university is taking up student when they are totally come unprepared. Why they dare to risk our life just for the sake to prove they can do it. So, why I never voice it out 3 years ago. Simple and nice reason, I put myself into their shoe. I understand how they feel. I forgive them. I learn how to give people another chance. Without these chances I also won’t be able to survive till today. But I also learned when we was given second chances we should have appreciates it (because we human, forgive but we never forget).

So, in this post I gonna vent it all out. Firstly, I wanna talk on lecturer issue. One thing I noticed about this university’s lecturer is that they are damn stubborn. They only stand on their opinion. They never listen to the student opinion. If they listen, they would become a better lecturer. I still remember (where I pretend to forget) the lecturer blames me for plagiarizing. When she can’t prove me on plagiarizing, she screamed out. And at the end of class I have to just keep quiet for the sake of my other coursemate. The worst ending she been blaming me on plagiarizing the photos (but I noticed other group also taking up the photo from the internet). But I just keep quiet. SHhhhhhh..

Move on, yesterday during a SIEP (super idiotic enterprise program) presentation, I saw another stubborn lecturer only talking from his point of view and looking for people silly mistake. He says my font is out only because I wrote “thank you” with a bigger size than other words. Then, he says I didn’t describe what type of company that I’m working. He didn’t saw it in the front page I guess and making a wild accusation. More, he says I didn’t really do a lot for my SIEP. I explained that I don’t really have experience so the owner doesn’t really allow me to operate the machine but just to observe. Then, he just smashed my report on the table and says this is the place I have chosen so that is my problem. At the end, I just keep quiet. SHHHhhhh..

What I vent it out today doesn’t mean I want them to apologize.

What happen in the past let’s keep in the past.

Life move on but we must remember so the bad thing won’t repeat.

Even you are smarter, wiser or better must always remember that who yourself back then.

You also had been down, worst or loser.

Ever wonder why you are still here today.

Not because you are smart or special

But you are only given a second chance.

So why don’t learn to accept

And give people another chance.

P.S:  I don’t mind if this post is share by others. I just want everybody to see how they are totally corrupted.

Ich vermisse Sie~

Sincerely from the bottom of my heart~

It’s been a week we are apart

My heart breaks from missing you.

I become fatigued from not having you near.

 My mind wonders as if I am lost, for I know I am.

I am lost without you.

Some days I smile to push back the pain.

But deep within my chest lies the sorrow of wanting her here with me.

I wish I could see you,

But, still I'm down

and Missing you~

After 4 months..

It’s been a blogging marathon recently (I had so many things in my mind to be told and share). After 4 month of long holiday, now I’m back in my university at Kelantan.

Fuhh~

Firstly, gonna say its headache where many things had to be managed (just as usual). Secondly, gonna say it’s troublesome (just as usual). Thirdly, gonna admit that I’m that damn homesick (miss my family, my ????, my dog, my basketball buddy, my working buddy, not forgotten my psp and etc)

For this first week I feel a bit down (maybe just because my brain was just too long in hibernating mood  :P). There is a lot up and down being back here.

 Let’s start with something down here. It’s all about my new hostel. They are bringing it from bad to worst. There about 20 people in 1 room but they only got for toilet to be use. There neither a study table nor a chair in the room (don’t blame if my result turned bad :P). There is no wifi in the room but at the cafeteria and study room.

Everyone gonna say you just go to the cafeteria or study room to use the internet. But for everyone information there is no table and chair at the study room.

 Now, everyone gonna say you just can sit on the floor. But for everyone information the floor is made of cement and it is full of dust no matter how many million time you clean it (a bit metaphor).

The next bad thing is the bus schedule. Amazingly, there is about 7-8 bus is provided however they only provide two bus shuttle service in the early morning and at night. Weird? Other universities can provide bus shuttle for every hour (some even every 30 minutes) but why my university cans does this. Nobody knows.

Lets view what’s is the up part. I get to move out from that place. My friends and I rent a house outside which is not really far from my main campus (took only 5 minutes to reach my campus with bicycle). The next up part is for this semester, I guess I’m lucky because a lot people willing to assist me. Even, less hater compare to before. Happy!!

When the holidays comes to an end~

I Love Bali..

This should be my last month post I supposed. However, due to might tight schedule and limited time I barely able to upload my vacation photo. So today I try to spend some time to update my blog.

My mini luggage for Bali trip

WOW!! It’s been two weeks since I visited Bali. But the memory was still fresh deep down in my mind.

I still remember a funny (maybe akward) moment that happens on me when I was in the flight. The situation is like this:

Flight attendant: Are you a foreigner??

the airport is located just next to the ocean

Me: No, I’m a Malaysian..
Flight attendant: Then you are a foreigner..
Me: LOL in the mind

Yea~ that’s my first time being a foreigner. Feels weird being called a foreigner. Anyway, the overall vacation was fun. Visited many places; from beach to temple, from paddy terraces to volcano mountain.

relaxing

at the beach

At the end of my four day visit, I’m exhausted but satisfied with my visit to Bali. For the rating of this visit I will give 3 out 5 and I recommend everyone to visit this place and watch it yourself the amazing architecture hand they had.

My gift for everyone who visited my post

p.s: here I will only upload few photo. For more photo, you can visit my facebook.

Peace ^^

Hair Story~

From long hair back to short hair..from short hair back to long hair..and now I’m back with my short hair ^^

I guess I have been 3 month I didn’t cut my hair. Well, I’m too busy working (great excuse :P). So, I decided to cut my hair once I quit my part-time job. So, my tonight post will be about my hairstyle. 

Pheww!! My hair has a long history. I still remember when I was still a kid (I guess around 6-12 years old) my hair is straight and silky (where I can swing it like the shampoo model in the ads :P). Back then I didn’t took care of it much (feels regret). When I growing up in to teenager the fluctuations of hormone have bring a forever change to my hair. My hair eventually became curly. It was hard to manage and style. So, I had bad hair day most of the time.

As time pass, my hair became more stable. Currently, if I keep my hair too long it will look wavy (look like Korean actor- Kim Bum :P). Anyway, it’s still hard to manage for me. I have to spend about 30 minutes to tidy up my super messy hair in the early morning if I’m going out (OMG!!).

That’s why I prefer short hair. There’s a lot of advantage for being short hair. I will list out few of it.

• ·         Easy to manage- its took me only 10 minutes to set my hairstyle
• ·         Save a lot money-use less shampoo and hair product
• ·         Easy to style-very limited hairstyle can be done

P.s = The following post for guy only (I doesn’t fit for girl). I would prefer girl in long hair rather than short. Is not because they will look ugly but it is natural selection. Conclusion, girls in long hair looks pretty; girls in short hair looks cute; guys in short hair looks masculine; guy in long hair looks gay :P

Gonna show my accessories..

My 3 months~

WOW!! This August is about to end. Time pass just like the blink of the eyes. It’s been one week I quit my job (Yeay! Finally, I can have a nice rest at home after a few working. LOL). I should had made this post last week but I’m that damn lazy (I have to admit it :P).

OK!! Today my post will be about what I had gone through for this 3 months working. First of all, I have met a lot new buddy. They are loveable. They share a lot of thing with me (really a lot- slow talk, chit chat, laughter, pranking, sings song and so many more). Seriously, gonna miss them a lot.

Secondly, I will always miss these 3 girls.

Girl #1- get to know her but didn’t get her name and her contacts (feels regret)

Girl #2- get to add her as my friend but never get a chance to talk to her due to some misunderstanding (feels regret too)

Girl #3- already a really close friend but she still can’t trust me (she would rather trust other guys than me- I hate this)

To sum it all up, I gained a lot new thing in my life in only a short time. I really wish I could have more time to spend with them. Let’s just hope that one day everyone will be meeting up again

~ Friendship are born, not made ~

My Day

Wow, I’m sorry for my last week too touching post. I feel bad about it too. I just in my recovery mood actually (trying hard to forget someone that once I love faithfully).

Move on, today post won’t be talking something emo. It is more of a celebration. Yeay!! Wohoo!! (I guess that is the way to show I’m that damn happy).  It’s been two year I didn’t celebrate my birthday with my family. On 7^th August 2011, I celebrated my birthday with my family. We went to One Utama to celebrate my birthday. Eat..play bowling..walk..walk..

At night back at home the celebration continue..hahaha..blow candle..cut cake..eat =)

This year celebration is more special than any other year..

Firstly, my family member is gaining (my sisters boyfriend came to celebrate for me too). Wondering when is my turn :P

Next, my birthday is celebrated one day earlier. But it’s okay because that day was my Chinese birthday though.

Even though this year is special, but my wishes for every year are the same. Firstly, nothing is more important than my family. I wish them healthy always. Love them a lot (being there with me for 22 years).

My next wish is secret and confidential (nobody knows :P)

On 8^th August 2011, sharp 12am I get a message from my really true friend (for long time) wishing me. She is the only friend that I never remind her about my birthday (true friend are hard to find, appreciate them).

Before that, I turn off my birthday on my facebook. Purpose? The purpose is to go through a humble birthday (back 2 year I have been through a lot of hardship). I guess not many would really sincerely wanted to wishes me so I turned it off so they don’t feel guilty for it (I guess I have a lot haters :P).

Anyway, those who wish me on facebook I really appreciate them. Especially my brother that was at USA (we really went through a lot together).

At the same day I went to work like usual. Didn’t mention about my birthday (because afraid of being prank :P). But nothing happened, everyone wishes me. Due to working I just managed to call few of my really close friends. Sorry for other that I didn’t call maybe next year :P

I guess that was my big day for this year.

My 22nd birthday cake

Thanks for those who tried hard to remember my birthday

Thanks for those who keep accompany me for this 22 year

I know it is not easy

I appreciate every moment we are together

=)

Who Cares!?

I am weak..

I am a loser..

I don’t deserve a love..

You can dump me after you use me..

You tell me you hurt..

But you don’t know..

You will never know..

I hurt more than you do..

It’s okay because I already use to it..

Being brought down everytime..

It’s just part of my life..

Can't see me cryin'

Just wish someone will saw me..

Faking a smile but dying from the inside..

Feeling like a lost soul..

Feeling to end this life..

But I can’t..

Don’t want to disappoint my lord..

Who give me life..

And brought me here for a reason..

Don’t dare to love..

Don’t dare to dream..

Don’t dare to hope..

Afraid I might let down others..

I’m sorry if I hurt anyone in my life..

I just don’t mean it..

Its happen too fast..

If I can go back to the past..

I will change it..

As long as everyone happy..

I hate this part..

What is the feeling when you want something but you can’t get it? Seriously, I hate this feeling. When I was a kid, I always thought when I grow up I won’t have this feeling anymore (as I can own anything I want and nothing can stop me). Anyway, my idea was so wrong in the first place. Till today, I am still being hunted by this feeling.

So after a long introduction (where I usually do on my school essay :P), I would like to enter to the main topic of my post. So this happen to me very recently (guess back few month ago) where I meet this girl. She was kind and nice; beautiful from inside and outside. Back then she was fine (at least she greet me like others). Everything started to change when my friend set up a fake date for me with her. She started to ignore me (she even purposely faded away from me when we meet). I feel some kind of awkwardness in this situation.

It’s not what in my heart to start a relationship with her. Deep in my heart, all I want is only a simple friendship. Right now all I wish is to clear thing out. I hope that I have the chances to slow talk with her where I can explain everything out. I just don’t like this feeling. I would rather lost a relationship than a friendship with her.

lets be friend^^

Exhausted!!

Fuhh!! I suppose that I’m off today but I feel damn exhausted. The reason is I just went play basketball today (I mean not on my PSP. LOL). It been two month since last I touched the basketball (I miss basketball so much). I guess I have been too busy with my part time job. Apart of that, my hand had injury previously (therefore, I need a long rest>>hibernate :P ).

So, today at the basketball court I play just like usual nothing much change. But I noticed my time reaction had been getting slower and stamina had run down faster than before. OMG!! I have to back to basic once again.

That’s ok for me as long as my hand had heal properly although I sometimes will feel the pain (especially when I playing my PSP for too long :P ).

LONG LIVE BASKETBALL

J

Broken Bridge..

OMG!! I just miss my blogging for the whole June. I have been too busy on my part time work (actually it doesn’t seem like part time). Almost every day I work from morning to the night (exhausted). Finally the fair is over and I feel glad but sometimes I miss the moment too (meeting a lot of new friends).

So, for July I will be quite free although I’m still working (happy). Therefore, I decide to make a post today. Emm.. (How I going to start this..)

OK!! Actually, I get the chance to be closer to the girl I admire for a long time. But the feeling is not the same anymore. The feeling is like we seem so close yet so far. Maybe we have been separated for quite a long time.  I guess she still can’t forget about that guy (which she thinks far better than me).Yea, now I’m really clueless.

Yes, I have to admit it that I ain’t no perfect because I’m still human. The negative side of me told me to give up and forget about her. However, my positive side told me to buff up and impress her. So, I decide to cooperate with my positive side to impress her. I know one day she will be impress (I will stay by her side). Currently, everything had fallen back to zero. I treat her like my friend and the way round (nothing more). 

Hopefully, we can get close back like we use to be (Sincerely, I miss that moment a lot)

Once there was a bridge construction

That was about to be done

Due to some reason

The bridge get broken and falling apart

Everything now is back to non

But I will rebuild it

Because I know it was worth it

=]

My Request..

Everyone in this world is born with instinct and feeling. There is certain criterion developed through the process of life that helps us a lot in making decision. What I’m going to talk about now (even myself get confuse).

This post I would like talk on which type of girl that I prefer. I really hope that this type of girl will came into my life. Actually my request was quite low (but everyone think the opposite about me =.=”’)

Emm.. let me start with my hardest request. LOL. The girl that I prefer should be understanding. She must be like a mind reader (I love mind reader). She can read my mind from the entire angle (WOW!! That was quite hard because till now nobody can exactly predict what's on my mind even my parent :P). Why I prefer a mind reader type girl? Because I hope that she will understand my inner side that is actually quite fragile. However, I would never told them to be understanding (I don't want to force them which brings me to my second request).

My second request is quite hard but it is easier compare to my first request (this sentence is complicated :P) which is committed. I just feel that when both parties in a relationship, both must be committed in their relationship. Both must willing to sacrifice (not their life) and committed which I see modern love quite hard to found it. Some girls or boys will just prefer being love rather than being in love (this is what I called selfish in a relationship). Hence, from the above situation the unfaithful issue will appear (I respect those who really committed themselves in a relationship). Actually, I have been facing this situation quite a few times in my life and I’m fed up with it.

The next request is being simple. This is simple. All she had to be is to be herself (another complicated sentence. LOL). I don’t want the girl that keep on pretending in front of me because I really can see if she is lying or not (I’m a good lying detector :P). Apart of being simple in characteristic, I also prefer a simple appearance. I never prefer a gorgeous girl such as Megan Fox. All I need I simple and nice. Just like Bruno Mars sang “Just the way you are” J

Seriously, I never thought that I would make this post but this is the unsung part of me. So, I have decided to post it but hopefully not many will read my post (after all it will be good laughter.LOL)

Life come and goes

Although it is short

Never give up in searching for the true one

Alright in the end of my post, I just wish everybody will found their true one.